防災の日の訓練が一転本番に─。麻生首相は1日朝、首相官邸で記者会見を開き
「全国を襲った衆院惨敗を“激甚災害”に指定。救援に全力を尽くす」
と発表した。すでに自衛隊も災害派遣に出動しており、各地でショックのあまり人事不省に陥った候補者の救出にあたるほか、惨事に乗じて社会不安を扇動する不穏分子の排除にあたっている。
麻生首相のもとに災害発生の一報が飛び込んできたのは31日未明。責任力あふれる宰相は瞬時にコトの重大さを把握し動き出した。偶然にも1日は防災の日。各地で救援のプロフェッショナルたちが準備万端でスタンバイしている。これ幸いと発令したのが、今回の激甚災害指定というわけだ。
命を受けた自衛隊は、さっそく出動を開始。各地で有権者の投げつけたゴミに生き埋めとなっている自民党の前衆院議員らを
「傷は浅いぞ、しっかりせよ」
と抱え上げ、指定救援所である国会議事堂に運ぶ。いっぽう「各地で不逞民主党員が井戸に毒を投げ込んでいる」との情報があることから、ネット有志の力も借りて自警団を組織。「“政策選択”と言ってみろ」と迫って
「セイケンセンタク」
と発音し馬脚をあらわした者は容赦なく銃殺に処している。
内閣府が発足させた「平成21年自民党惨敗政変対策委員会」によると、こうした迅速な措置により自民党の議席数は一両日中にも480程度まで回復する見込み。委員長に就任した麻生首相は
「被災者の方々には経済的補償も万全を尽くしたい。党の盟友である幸福実現党・大川隆法総裁など行方不明のままの方も多いが、すみやかに遺体が見つかることをお祈りしている」
とのコメントを発表した。
住所：ねはん
職業：日本会議シンパ
今回は妙に静かだった大勲位とナベツネあたりが本当に考えていそうで怖いです。共謀罪で予備拘束すべきですね。
童貞男が婦女暴行を働いているとの通報を受け、麹町警務隊はただちに出動。お台場コミケ会場で、エロ同人誌を抱える不逞人間を逮捕。警務隊本部で３人を「処置した」とのこと。
ただ、麻生と並ぶぐらい、ハトらはボケでボーガスにネタを提供してくれそうですね。
名付けて、平成自民の変の勃発ですね。
自民党の議席が回復された後に、ちゃっかり自民党が衆議院選挙で惨敗したことはなかったと言うことになるんでしょうね。
南京大虐殺以来のお約束ですね。
住所：北海道（選挙時のみ）
職業：ニート
必殺技：酔拳
うぅ、、ど、どこだ！
うー、非常事態宣言みたいなものが出ました、、ひっく、、
住所：ちたま
職業：アルファコメンター
同じく党の盟友でも学位２５０個超持ってる大先生には手が出せないんでしょうか？
＞投げつけたゴミに生き埋めとなっている自民党の前衆院議員
主幹さま… それで安心していたら比例復活という補助パワーを発動させたターミネーター…もとい大物議員達にはまいりました。
審判の日を過ぎても彼らは稼働しているから、もうどうすればいいでしょう…
住所：ねはん
職業：便衣兵
下野毛新聞の記事抜粋
「８月31日23時頃、日光市内を60歳代の人品卑しき男性がシェィシャクシェンタクシェイシャクシェンタクと訳のわからない言葉を発しながら徘徊する姿が目撃された。日光警察署は言葉から在日特アもしくは不貞九州人であり今回の未曾有の大災害の関係者の可能性が高いとみて身柄確保に向かっている。なお男はヒョットコのお面をかぶっていたとの目撃情報もある。なお男の足跡は華厳の滝周辺で消えていた模様」
（下野毛新聞はよインテリが作ってっからぁ標準語ぉ巧ぇべ？）
住所：靖国神社
職業：めがねっ娘
>すみやかに遺体が見つかることをお祈りしている
「お前も、もう、死んでいる」(政治生命的には)
住所：投票箱内
職業：天皇陵発掘担当官
この広い世の中には、９議席とか７議席とか一桁の議席獲得数に安堵し、ささやかな幸せを感じている貧しい党派の人々もいるというのに、１１９議席に満足できないアサナマとか言う奴は何とも欲深なボンボンと呼ぶ他はないわなあ。
なお、今回の激甚災害の救済に当たっては、宰相自らがみぞうゆうの個人資産を投じたとも報じられている。
「さすが麻生の殿様」
「滅私奉公とは公僕の鑑」
と賞賛の声が挙がる一方、
「それって単に買収じゃね？」
と、公職選挙法違反を視野に警察が動き出したモヨウ。
未曽有の大災害の震源と見られる男を拘束しなくていいのだろうか？「踏襲」という字を読ませれば、すぐ見分けられるぞ。
住所：匿名掲示板
職業：ネトアサ
>大川隆法総裁など行方不明のままの方も多いが、すみやかに遺体が見つかることをお祈りしている
また失言か？行方不明なのは「守護霊」だろ！
住所：靖国神社
某新聞が「これからが本領を発揮するところ」などと不穏なことをつぶやいていたのは、この計画を指していたんですね。
あの時点で予備拘束をしておけば･･･。
こうなると、逆ホタル･･･いや逆神として惨敗に拍車をかけた空気読めない知事とか、散々支援してもらっといて掌を返した府知事とかの安否が気遣われます。
大川総裁のみならず、草加市在住の池田さんの行方もわからなくなっており、
捜索に当たった太田さん・北側さんらまでもが消息を絶つという
二次災害が発生しております。
なお、山口県では安倍さんが元気な姿で発見され、
自衛隊員たちも手を取り合って喜ぶという微笑ましい光景が見られましたが、
すでに内臓に深刻なダメージを負っていることが判明し、
周囲は絶望感に打ち拉がれているということです。
住所：ルビヤンカ
職業：KGB
近日中にタロ－くんは、
「下々の皆さん、名古屋県で民主党が全議席を確保しましたが、これは名古屋県だからよかったわけで、東京だったら一大事ですよ。」
とスピーチして、名古屋県民の怒りを買うこと間違いなしだと思いまする。
住所：ルビヤンカ
職業：KGB
しまった、“小選挙区で”というのを書き忘れた！ｏｒｚ
１１９議席をひっくり返すと９１１になり、４年前の選挙の日にちや、アメリカ同時多発テロの日付になります。
住所：ねはん
職業：デカブリスト
なんかみんな勘違いしているようですが、今回は自民が負けたのであってアソーちゃんが負けたわけではありません。
もうおわかりですね。アソーちゃんはミンスに入ってそーさいになればいい話なのです。
だから今回の事態も「災害」ではありません。実は「粛清」なのです。
重荷を切り捨てたアソーちゃんのこれからに期待です。クエー。
住所：ニュースJAPAN
>ネット有志の力も借りて
おかしいなぁ？
ネット有識者の方々は
選挙結果を受けて出国なされたはず。
脱出したつもりの外国で「祖国に帰れ」と
デモされて引き返して来たのかね？
住所：シベリア
職業：自室警備員
慌てて探さなくても１年くらいしてから九段下の神社に行けば、みんな勢揃いだと思う。
住所：銀河系
職業：IT士方
> 有権者の投げつけたゴミ
自民およびその取り巻き連中が各ご家庭にぶち撒いた電波チラシのことですね。ウチに来たら住居侵入および不退去でケーサツに突き出してやったのに。ちっ。
> 「各地で不逞民主党員が井戸に毒を投げ込んでいる」
井戸＝投票箱
毒＝民主党候補および民主党の名前を書いた投票用紙
という暗喩ですね。
> 「セイケンセンタク」
「セェサクセンタク」とべらんめぇで発音するのが正しい、というとてつもない日本人の常識についての口頭試問です。ちなみに、どうしても発音ができない人(ex.栃木県民)は、駐在さんに「此の者は栃木県出身なれど民主党員に非ざることを証す」という書き付けをもらってきて、自衛隊員に見せるとよいです。
住所：不定
職業：馬賊
牀前看寧鎮
疑是褥上血
挙頭望駅弁
低頭思赤貝
(大意)
どんな大災害に遭っても
ネカフェが異空間に飛ばされても
ねいちんと駅弁賞味して
赤貝美味しい如。
職業：従軍慰安婦
福田みすゞの鮮烈デビューから早一年ですね。
時が経つのは早いものですぅ。
上のゴミ
さむかろな。
つめたい視線がさしていて。
下のゴミ
重かろな。
何百人ものせていて。
中の人
さみしかろな。
金も未来もみえないで。
防災の日に合わせて記事を1日ズラしたんですか。
全ては「計画通り」だった訳ですね。
う～ん、今回は完全に主幹様の掌の上で踊らされたようですね。正直感服しました。
＞社会不安を煽る不穏分子
それは、「金融危機でドルが揺らいだ」「世界は多極化へ向かう」とポッポ兄が英字紙の二番煎じを講演すると「イエロージャップの分際で生意気な！」と口真似すら許さない、屁狸てーじ罪団が、ですか？
屁狸てーじ罪団の言い分をそのまま流すマスゴミが不穏分子ですか？
麻生は今日で死にました。
＞選挙結果を受けて出国なされたはず。
ＩＺＡブログの「わが祖国」はマジでもうすぐ日本をでていくらしいですよ。
なんでもこの国に絶望して南国の親日国に移り住むとかなんとか。
しかしさすがは酷死さま、なんと遠い外国でも国旗を掲げて生きていくそうです。
住所：皇居
職業：自室警備員
> なかったと言うこと
「我が国は有志以来、民主党政権である」と歴史の教科書にも書いてある…いま書き換わったようである。
不逞民主党員が社会主義者とともに井戸に毒を投げ込んでいるという情報をうけ、千葉県下では自警団が組織された。
緊張の中、「完全無所属だ」などとあいまいなことをいう政治家が、民主党員とみなされ、自警団の鍬やこん棒で誤殺されるという痛ましい事件が起こった。
後で調べてみると、この政治家は自民党員だったという。
━千葉県の郷土史より。
住所：靖国神社
職業：二千万特攻の司令官
>「完全無所属だ」などとあいまいなことをいう政治家
この人物は剣道二段だったと聞いているが、自警団の鍬やこん棒ごときに勝てなかったのだろうか。妙な話である。
住所：靖国神社
職業：めがねっ娘
大西閣下>
剣道二段と言っても、金許しか、義理許しの二段では？
住所：海外(北海道)
職業：烏賊
タモが宿泊業界の資金と大宇宙からの電波を受け、最前線で活躍したいと言い始めているそうですぞ。
住所：靖国神社
>外国でも国旗を掲げて生きていくそうです。
素晴らしいお心がけです。
在日は皆帰化して日本に従えという方達ですし、もちろん現地の国旗ですよね？
>タモが(略)最前線で活躍
今時のトレンドではアフガンかソマリア(陸上)あたりでしょうか。
幸福実現党 選挙結果
麻生首相、衆院惨敗を激甚災害指定─自衛隊 21年自民党惨敗政変対策委員会」による…
住所：匿名掲示板
職業：工作員
幸福実現党の方々は遺体になられたのですね。残念です。まもなく北朝鮮からミサイルが撃ち込まれるそうです。それに対抗できる幸福実現党がいないので、ニホンはオワタです。
>この人物は剣道二段だったと聞いているが、自警団の鍬やこん棒ごときに勝てなかったのだろうか。妙な話である。
タガーナイフ所持でも捕まる今のご時勢。真剣を持ち歩くなど、逮捕してくれといっているようなものですから不可能でしょう。
いくら剣道二段でも、「男」の武器、肉棒一本では勝てませんよ。
住所：不定
職業：馬賊
>「男」の武器、肉棒一本
呼んだか如？
住所：四次元
職業：櫻井よしこ
剣道二段が死んだら、またナンミョー知事に逆戻りじゃねえか！！どーしてくれるんだ、ああん？？？
いっそのことこの際落花生国はスパイダーマンやハルクのように、世界一ごうつくなネズミ一族に買い取ってもらい、全部ネズミー・ランドにしてもらえばいいのではﾅｶﾛｶ。
そうすればいちいち知事を選んだり、その知事の経歴をチェックしたりという手間も省ける。むしろネズミーランドは社内情報を外部に出すのは厳禁だしね。
（･∀･）全県滑走路ﾆｽﾙﾖﾘﾖｶﾛｳ？
衆院選、自民党歴史的惨敗
30日に投開票された第45回衆議院議員選挙で、自由民主党は公示前勢力300議席の半分にも届かずに第一党から転落するという、歴史的惨敗を喫しました。特に小選挙区では、現職閣僚や閣僚経験者が相次いで敗れ、前回4年前の総選挙で初当選した「小泉チルドレン」も、立候補した77人のうち再選したのは、比例復活を含めわずか10人でした。
***♪VOTE♪
今回はこのザマじゃ
選挙区もダメな閣僚
本流の地盤なくしている
そう野田聖子
柳沢や丹羽尾身
ひどい負けの片山さつき
かろうじて復活する
小池百合子さ
見てごらん また負けてるだろう
誰かさんも
ほらごらん 野党が潰し…
住所：匿名掲示板
職業：工作員
国民を監視するのが仕事の警察と違って、軍隊は大衆の方に付くので、民意に否定された自民党議員を取り締まるとおもいます。自警団とかも少数の弱い者にしか牙をむかないので、自民党狩りやネトウヨ狩りをすることでしょう。
悪夢です。麻生首相は自衛隊に出動命令を発してはいけません。
住所：匿名掲示板
職業：工作員
“軍隊は市民の側に立つので”と書くべきだったか。
http://ja.wikipedia.org/wiki/%E3%82%BD%E9%80%A38%E6%9C%88%E3%82%AF%E3%83%BC%E3%83%87%E3%82%BF%E3%83%BC
http://ja.wikipedia.org/wiki/1989%E5%B9%B4%E3%83%AB%E3%83%BC%E3%83%9E%E3%83%8B%E3%82%A2%E9%9D%A9%E5%91%BD
市民は自衛隊と仲良くしましょう。
住所：皇居
職業：自室警備員
> 電車男殿
軍隊が市民の側に付くような国(=政府)は早々に滅ぶ例のような気がしてならない。
やはり、お国のためには市民の1億や2億なぞ問題ではない、というのが伝統的な日本軍のあるべき姿であろう。
住所：匿名掲示板
職業：工作員
そうでしたか。だから滅んだのですね。
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