無線LAN機能を搭載した「ニンテンドーDS」などの普及で、電車の中でもこうしたゲーム機に夢中になる人が増えてきた。それにつれクローズアップされているのが「ウェップ」の危険性だ。神戸大学と広島大学の研究者グループは、18日までに
「ウェップを一瞬で解読する方法」
を開発したことを明らかにした。電車内でニンテンドーDSを遊んでいる人の惨事を減らすうえで大いに役立ちそうだ。
「金曜の終電で座っていたら前でフラフラしていた酔っ払いがいきなり“ウェップ”してぶっかけられた」というインシデントは昔から知られていたが、DSが普及するにつれゲームに夢中になり危険な酔っ払いの接近に気付かず被害に遭う例が激増。対策が急務となっていた。今回の研究は、こうした被害を未然に防ごうと
「ウェップの兆候を一瞬で解読する方法はないか」
と、森井昌克神戸大学教授らを中心としたグループが長年取り組んでいたもの。
発表された論文によると、ウェップ兆候を解読するには「五感の120パーセントの活用がカギ」とのこと。ゲーム中も
- 周囲か酒臭くないか
- ろれつのまわらない人がいないか
- ふらふらとしている人はいないか
- とつぜん顔の青ざめはじめた人はいないか
に気を配っていれば、ウェップの「ウ」の字ぐらいのところで逃げられるとしている。
いっぽうで森井教授は「それでも被害を受けてしまった場合、むやみに怒ってはいけない。ゲロではなく、しもつかれをふるまってくれた栃木県人の可能性もある」と、食文化保護の重要性も指摘。根本的な解決には、bogusnewsのアフィリエイトリンクからWPA対応の新型ニンテンドーDSを買うしかないとしている。ぜひリンクをクリックしてほしいところだ。
住所：靖国神社
職業：櫻井よしこ
日々の記事に主幹さまから私への愛のささやきを解読しましたわ。ぜひ近いうちにも、二人の愛を確認しましょうね。
住所：名古屋県
某瓦斯ニュース紙上で月に１、２回の存在が確認されている予告無しの休刊と、日教組（日本教職員組合）活動の間に一定の関係がうかがえることが研究者の調査で分かった。日教組と主幹の関係は？
調査したのは、統計学に詳しい産経新聞政治運動部記者の阿比留瑠比さんと、教育評論家で祝電マニアの小林正・元参院議員。
某瓦斯ニュースが休刊したのは08年で見ると、１月30日、２月22日、３月10、17日、４月27日、５月21日、６月21日、７月26日、８月17日、９月19、20日、10月18日の12回。２人は、日教組の活動指数の一つである声明・談話が発表された日付に着目、休刊との相関関係を調べた。
この結果、某瓦斯ニュース休刊後２週間程度で、何らかの声明や談話が出される傾向が強いことが分かったという。特に顕著なのは３月31日、４月３日の談話で、学習指導要領、映画「靖国」という主幹がよだれを垂らしそうなテーマ。この前２週間を見ると、３月10、17日に２回も休刊しており、強い関係がうかがえるという。
一方、４月、５月、６月の休刊後には主だった声明は出なかったが、関係者によると、非公表の声明を出していた可能性があるという。日教組問題に詳しい中山成彬さんは「あえて言わない。やっぱり出る」と話している。
・周囲が神社ではないか
・自称女子中学二年生と言っている人かいないか
・神機到来といっている人はいないか
・とつぜん私への愛のささやきなどとのろけている人はいないか
に気を配っていれば、妙齢の女性ジャーナリスト さん から逃げられるとしている。
主幹さまの逃亡者としての冒険活劇を期待しています。
>電車内でニンテンドーDSを・・・
ちょっとまて、おかしいのではないか？たしかにニンテンドーDSはWEPにしか対応していないが、電車内には無線LANのアクセスポイントがなく、WEPを使ったWiFi通信をすることができないのである。だから、電車内のニンテンドーDSのプレイととウェップには関係がないのではないだろうか。
アフィリエイトリンクにしたって旧型ニンテンドーDSにするより、液晶が綺麗になって人気の新型PSP-3000にリンクしておいた方が買う人も多かったかもしれない。PSPはWPA対応なので、根本的にウェップの心配をしなくてもすむ。
まっ、まさか！
主幹の逃亡劇で休刊が…っ？！
そんな…。
一体何を楽しみに、人生を生きて行けと…。orz
住所：ルビヤンカ
職業：KGB
＞ゲロではなく、しもつかれをふるまってくれた栃木県人の可能性もある。
もんじゃ焼きをふるまってくれた月島の住民の可能性もありますな。
＞bogusnewsのアフィリエイトリンクからWPA対応の新型ニンテンドーDSを買うしかないとしている。ぜひリンクをクリックしてほしいところだ。
よほどアフェリがうまくいっていないんでしょうねぇ、主幹。
＞電車内には無線LANのアクセスポイントがなく
電車内で無線LANが使えるのは、つくばエクスプレスで常識となった。きさま、栃木県人だなっ！
「朝の満員電車で立っていたら後ろでモゾモゾしていた痴漢がいきなり“ドッピュン”してぶっかけられた」というインシデントはこの方法では回避できません。周囲が栗の花臭くなったときにはすでに遅いからです。
> 「朝の満員電車で…
問答無用で連結器を本体から切断しよう。
「しもつかれ」や「もんじゃ」ではありませんが、蒟蒻ゼリーは群馬と岐阜の代理戦争と聞きました。
群馬のマンナンライフを岐阜のマルチ聖子が地元企業と結託して潰そうとしてる！と。
住所：ネットカフェ
職業：めがねっ娘
＞連結器を切断しよう。
マニアの間では密着連結器がその逞しい形状から人気だそうです。
住所：皇居
職業：自室警備員
これは、国際的犯罪組織「わーるどわいどうぇっぷ」の陰謀である。そう、世界的な組織なのである。また、意外と身近な存在でありながら、詳細を知る者は少ないらしい。
おっと、「じごくうんでぃーねさん」の迎えがきたようだ。今日はここまでとしよう。
住所：不定
職業：馬賊
「白いのいっぱいかけて」とねいちんにいわれて６０分三発勝負だにょ。
住所：不定
職業：馬賊
効果音は笑福亭鶴光の
「ええか～ええのんか～
最高か～、う、で、ＤＥＬＬ」
だ如。
住所：東別院
い、い、ｲﾔﾗｼｲわねッ！白いのいっぱいかけたり主幹が日教組と爛れた関係だったり！白いのいっぱい出る同人誌がてんこ盛りの某即売会がカタログ冒頭のご挨拶で「中山発言擁護・日教組粉砕・毎日糾弾」を口にする位ｲﾔﾗｼｲわッ！
でも一体全体ナニ考えて擦り寄ってンのかしら？将来児ポ法強化された際のお・め・こ…ぼし狙い？オトナって汚い！ｳｪｯﾌﾟッ！
>女子中学二年生さん
ツンデレ乙
いやあ、実際に被害が大きいのはウェップよりも「ロッパー」、DSよりもケータイですぞ。
対策としてCPUに68000を搭載したクラシックiPhoneの開発が望まれます。
アイスランドの賭け屋がオバマ当確を出した昨今ですが、♪ゲロッパ！ヴギウギ！と唄ったアカペラの黒人牧師さんが思い出されます。
住所：私鉄沿線
職業：おさわりパブ(別名：終電） 車掌
素晴らしい研究です。研究グループの先生方には、未然に防ぐための防止策だけでなく、さらに一歩踏み込んだ事後処理の自動化の研究まで進んでいただけますと助かります！
さらには究極の技術
『もらいウェップ』防止機能の開発まで・・・
と書いてたら自分でキモチ悪くなりました。
(;´Д｀)ｳｪｯﾌﾟ
毒乳や毒米、毒野菜にクスリっぽいアルコールとヤバい食品流行りの昨今、ウェップは命を救う！
ウェップは食べ過ぎ飲み過ぎの害からも、人々を守っています。
住所：おうち
職業：荒らし
ゲロとしもつかれを判別するひとつの方法として、粉砕された鮭の頭部の混入の有無を調査する方法があります。一般に、鮭の頭部は食用とされないため、鮭の頭蓋骨が検出された場合、しもつかれである可能性が高いと思われます。
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