団塊世代には懐かしいNHKの人形劇が、まったく新しい脚本で帰ってきた。今月中旬から放映開始した
「新三十四」
が話題を呼んでいる。脚本には人気作家の三谷幸喜を起用。30歳を越えて魔法を操れるようになった童貞紳士たちの活躍を描く冒険活劇だ。
あらすじ。樽谷安三郎は栃木県に暮らす34歳童貞の魔法使い。父親とともに童貞力を磨く修行の日々を過ごしていたが、都から来た謎のイケメンに父を殺されたため追いかけてアキハバラにやってきた。そこで樽谷は三人の34歳童貞紳士と巡り会い、国を傾けようとするイケメンどもの陰謀を食い止めるべく、共に闘うことになる…。
34歳童貞紳士の面々：
- アトス
エロゲーマニア。いつも栗の花の匂いを漂わせている - ポルトス
アイドルオタ。巨体ながらオタ芸では右に出る者なし - アラミス
見た目はイケメンだが、ギャルゲーしか話題の引き出しがない
これら4人の“三十四”が、“オサレ枢機卿”や“ナックル伯爵”、そして悪女・美礼木寧々の陰謀を食い止めるため、日夜匿名掲示板でカキコを続けるという筋立て。主人公らが延々とパソコンに向かっている姿は人形とは言えリアルで、見ているとこちらも手に汗をかいてきそうだ。それにしても実写でなくてよかった。
住所：靖国神社
職業：めがねっ娘
>父親とともに童貞力を磨く修行の日々を過ごしていたが、
父親も童貞なのか??
で、この人形劇のモデルになった伝説の魔法使いは誰なんですか？
え、みなさん言わなくてもわかってるって？ね、主幹。
住所：ルビヤンカ
職業：KGB
＞樽谷安三郎は栃木県に暮らす34歳童貞の魔法使い。
しゅ、主幹・・・・。
（早い者勝ち！）
住所：ルビヤンカ
職業：KGB
しまった、おしむさんに先を越された！！ orz
>父親も童貞なのか??
ちなみに母親は処女。
住所：ルビヤンカ
職業：KGB
>見ているとこちらも手に汗をかいてきそうだ。
一般人は手に汗ではなく、冷や汗というかヘンな汗をかきそうです。
もっとも、なかには身につまされて涙ぐむ魔法使い同志もいそうですが・・・。
>見ているとこちらも手に汗をかいてきそうだ。それにしても実写でなくてよかった
自らの姿を第三者の視点から想像したらこわくてこわくなったんだよ、なぼのぼの状態におちいった某瓦斯編集主幹（樽谷安三郎）なわけですね。わかります
（･∀･）筑波ﾉ「がま」ﾄｶ言ｳﾄ怒ﾙﾓﾝﾅ
童貞と処女の父母から、主人公が人工授精で産まれたとして…？
それは宗教的理由？
何故なんです？
救世主だから、とか？
住所：皇居
職業：自室警備員
三重死ではないとな。よかった、三度死んだ主幹はいないんだ…。
住所：ねはん
職業：童貞
>ちなみに母親は処女。
勘弁してください。
そんな奴は二千年前のあいつだけでたくさんです。
ま、それはそれとして。
大真面目な話40、50でドーテーという方たちが跋扈するなか、30で魔法使いというのもまあそのなんですなあ。
意外かもしれませんがアメリカあたりでも高齢童貞は多いんですな。プレーボーイとかに載ってた人生相談でよく見かけたもんです。日本と違ってたいてい宗教がらみなんですな。
うん、やっぱり二千年前のあいつが悪い！（あ、まとまった）。
童貞力の定義とは、さて？
主幹さまはモテないでいいですかね…
もう… 寝ます…
住所：靖国神社
職業：めがねっ娘
>>父親も童貞なのか??
>ちなみに母親は処女。
つまり、主幹は、木の股から生えたか、橋の下で拾われた、と。
住所：ねはん
職業：便衣兵
長勇さんは５時間半も寝ないで考えてたんけ？
んな事やってっからいつまでたっても童貞なんだべ！
住所：皇居
職業：ネット右翼
三十四はどうでもいいが、三銃士は銃ではなく剣を持っているのになぜ「銃」士なのかが目下の疑問。
職業:処女
>ｱﾎｳﾖさん
三人揃って股間の大砲がそれはそれは立派だからだと思うの（ごくり
そして三十四の童貞力にみなぎる大砲も意外とﾌﾋﾋﾋﾋ
住所：四次元
ファミコンで「おたくの星座」というゲームがあって
…いやあ、いろんな意味で大味でした。
住所：皇居
職業：自室警備員
> 父親とともに童貞力を
父親は「錬金術師」ではないだろうか。つまり、息子は「ほむんくるす」である。とすると、魔法に見えるものは実は科学ということになる。
>アホウヨ さん
マジレスするとあの時代の銃は何十秒に一発しか撃てなく、雨とか不発とかがあると終わりなので銃士の人は必ず接近戦用武器も持っているのです。それもできなくなったとき用に銃身を持って台尻で殴るのが割と普通の使い方だったりします。
住所：靖国神社
職業：二千万特攻の司令官
なお次回作は樽谷安三郎が孤島で妙齢の女史たちに囲まれてモテモテとなる続編『もっこり昇天島』に決定している。
住所：おうち
職業：工作員
＞父親とともに
２年前、３日付き合って
ABCのAすら無しに振られた
元カノが、突然赤子を連れ
てきて言う。
「貴方の子です」
明らかに意味のわからんことを言っているが、
コレをきっかけにヨリ戻せるかもという下心発動で
子供を預かる。
罠だった。
元カノは新彼とドロン。
かくして童貞のまま
父として子供を育てることに…。
というような話ですね。
わかります。
…しかしせめて娘なら
もうちょっと救いが（略
童貞＋ヲタ＋ネトウヨ＋ちゃねらー＋三十路越えで、ロイヤルストレートフラッシュの完成ですね。
住所：不定
職業：IT士方
ボナシュー夫人や王妃を絡ませる方法が全く見つからない！
ちなみに、妹は二次元
住所：匿名掲示板
職業：工作員
これはいい作品ですね。
現実のネトウヨ、嫌韓中レイシスト、ファシスト、人格障害サディスト、変態セカンドレイパー、売国奴、デマゴーグなどは、たいていイケメンで裕福で高学歴で異性に不自由しないリア充だったりします。
この人形劇は、世間から忌み嫌われる童貞紳士が、実は我が身を犠牲にして人の世に尽くす聖人だった、という真実を描く傑作となるでしょう。
住所：おうち
職業：自室警備員
ヘビは一匹でいい。魔法使いは一人で十分だ！
とアラミスが魔法使い狩りを始める続編はBDでのみ2010年発売予定。
住所：靖国神社
職業：日本会議シンパ
＞あほうよ様
ダルタニアン物語を読みましたが、１７世紀には銃が登場し、そのためマスケッターと呼ばれる歩兵が軍の中枢エリートになりつつありました。下級貴族でも立身出世の道があったため、ダルニアンは目指したそうです。（本当）
ちなみにあれの発射をマグナムという俗語は、そこから、女性たちのあこがれとなったため、できたそうです。（ウソ）
ちょっと質問です。
産経新聞の福島香織さんが退社（下野？）されるそうですが、ボ−ガスニュ−ス社に再就職という話はないのですか？
>ボナシュー夫人や王妃を絡ませる方法が全く見つからない
そこでネカマですよ！
＞ヘビは一匹でいい。魔法使いは一人で十分だ。
イルカ＆クジラ崇拝についての作品キボンヌ
あんたは三十四か、
おいらは三十九だ。
三重苦だとよ。
住所：ねはん
職業：童貞
>イルカ＆クジラ崇拝についての作品キボンヌ
マジレスすると。
もうあれは骨がらみの宗教そのものですからね。
変にかかわらない方がいいですよ。もう人間そのものが嫌になる。
あたしが言うんだから間違いないっす。
住所：教育テレビ
職業：獣の奏者
主幹さまは、同じNHKの放送なのに、私のアニメはちっとも取り上げてくれないんですね。やはり、私が幼女から大人に成長したせいでしょうか？
「一度ネタにしたぐらいで、しつこく付きまとうな！」ですって？ そうですか…。
リラン、このかたをやってしまいなさい！
＞国を傾けようとするイケメンども
もしかしてもしかすると、民主党の面々が…？
仮に自民がイケメンだったらもっとどうしよう…
自分の美的感覚は間違ってるんでしょうか？
自信がなくなって来ました…
ここは酷い窓７祭りですね
HDDなしのVY12FCHを捕獲。あとでSSD探さないとな
あと窓７届いた。弟者のVAIOSZに放り込む予定なんだけど
クリーンインストールは出来るのかとかドライバはどうなってるのかの情報も集めないとな
Windows 7情報 | サポート | VAIO | ソニー
http://vcl.vaio.sony.co.jp/windows/7/upgrade/readme.html
ちっとも新OSとは関係のない日常だな
住所：不定
職業：馬賊
＞このかたをやってしまいなさい！
ねいちんなら駅弁やってしまう如。
流石馬大人、雌なら王獣でもOKとは。感服つかまつりました。
そして眼前に蘇る交尾。あれはない
住所：ダンボール
職業：伝説の包茎
>ヘビは一匹でいい
うおぉぉぉぉぉぉ！ルィキッドルオォォォォ！！
住所：ちたま
職業：アルファコメンター
主幹さんは１６進法３４歳で名前は清貞さんじゃなかったかな？
>ヘビは一匹でいい
これが原作最終巻『童貞よ、さらば』の安三郎の最後の台詞につながるわけですね、わかります。
タイトルで安三郎がついに……と思わせておいて、実は……というオチは多くの読者の涙を誘いました。
ここまで♪愛情するよりこんな時ー友情しーたーいー（ﾌﾟｯ）の「アニメ三銃士」ネタ無し…
ナデアほど新しくないけど、無視するのはなんか違うと思うの。
住所：コミケ会場（晴海）
職業：80年代アニメ愛好家
>ここまで♪愛情するよりこんな時ー友情しーたーいー（ﾌﾟｯ）の「アニメ三銃士」ネタ無し…
上着を着ているのに下半身は丸出しの『ワンワン三銃士』もないな…。
住所：皇居
職業：自室警備員
「未来ろぼ だるたにあす」とは初耳である。
アグ ムートン ブーツ
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